Many of you may have already read this poem. Although it was written in 1922, it recently spread across the Internet as a funny way to test your spoken English. It contains almost all the exceptions in the English pronunciation!
Its author, Gerard Nolst Trenité, was a Dutch teacher and linguist who tried to gathere the irregularities of the British-English pronunciation in a book called Drop Your Foreign Accent: engelsche uitspraakoefeningen.
Why do I retrieve this poem now? I recently moved to an English-speaking country. I soon realized that, especially when I am tired or rushed, I overlook my pronunciation and I drop the Spanish accent in the trickiest vowels.
I realized that I could practice by reading this poem aloud once a day. But I couldn’t, because… how do I pronounce ‘feoffer’? And ‘demesne’?
Here you will find the whole poem by Nolst Trenité. I also added the IPA transcription, so that you can practice while you read it without having to stop and look it up every time.
The Chaos (1922)
/ˈkriːtʃəʳ/ /kriːˈeɪʃən/
Dearest creature in creation,
/prəˌnʌnsɪˈeɪʃən/
Study English pronunciation.
/v3ːs/
I will teach you in my verse
/kɔːps/ /ˈkȯr/ /hɔːs/ /w3ːs/
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
/ˈSuzɪ/ /ˈbɪzɪ/
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
/hed/ /hiːt/ /ˈdɪzɪ/
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
/tɪə/ /tɛə/
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
/kwiə/ /fɛə ‘siːə/ /hıə/ /prɛə/
Queer, fair seer, hear my prayer.
/preı/ /kən’səʊl/ /’pəʊıt/
Pray, console your loving poet,
/kəʊt/ /njuː/ /səʊ/
Make my coat look new, dear, sew it!
/hɑːt/ /bɪəd/ /h3ːd/
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
/daɪs/ /ˈdaɪət/ /lɔːd/ /w3ːd/
Dies and diet, lord and word.
/sɔːd/ /swɔːd/ /rɪˈteɪn/ /ˈbrɪtən/
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
/ˈlætəʳ/ /ˈrɪtn/
(Mind the latter how it’s written.)
/meıd/ /bæd/
Made has not the sound of bade,
/seı/ /sɛd/
/peı/ /peıd/ /leıd/ /plæd/
Say–said, pay–paid, laid but plaid.
/ˈʃʊəlɪ/ /pleɪg/
Now I surely will not plague you
/veıg/ /ˈeɪgjuː/
With such words as vague and ague.
/spiːk/
But be careful how you speak:
/gʌʃ/ /bʊʃ/ /steık/ /striːk/ /breık/ /bliːk/
Say: gush, bush, steak, streak, break, bleak,
/’priːvıəs/ /’prɛʃəs/ /’fjuːʃə/ /’vaıə/
Previous, precious, fuchsia, via
/’rɛsipi/ /paıp/ /’stʌdnsəl/ /’kwaiə/
Recipe, pipe, studding-sail, choir;
/’wəʊvn/ /ˈʌvn/ /haʊ/ /ləʊ/
Woven, oven, how and low,
/skrɪpt/ /rɪˈsiːt/ /ʃuː/ /ˈpəʊɪm/ /təʊ/
Script, receipt, shoe, poem, and toe.
/seɪ/ /ˈtrɪkərɪ/
Say, expecting fraud and trickery:
/ˈdɔːtəʳ/ /ˈlɑːftəʳ/ /təːpˈsɪkəɹi/
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
/brɑːnʧ/ /rɑːntʃ/ /miːzlz/ /ˈtɒpslz/ /ˈaılz/
Branch, ranch, measles, topsails, aisles,
/ˈmisailz/ /ˈsimiliz/ / riˈvailz/
Missiles, similes, reviles.
/’həʊli/ /ˈhɒli/ /’sıgnl/ /’saınıŋ/
Wholly, holly, signal, signing,
/seım/ /ıgˈzæmınıŋ/ /’maınıŋ/
Same, examining, but mining,
/ˈskɒlə/ /ˈvɪkə/ /sɪˈgɑː/
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
/ˈsəʊlə/ /ˈmaɪkə/ /wɔː/ /fɑː/
Solar, mica, war and far.
/dı’zaıə/ /dı’zaırəbl/ /’ædmırəbl/ /ædˈmaiə/
From “desire“: desirable –admirable from “admire“,
/’lʌmbə/ /’plʌmə/ /biə/ /’braıə/
Lumber, plumber, bier, but brier,
/ˈtɒpʃəm/ /’bruːm/ /rı’naʊn/ /nəʊn/
Topsham, brougham, renown, but known,
/‘nɒlıʤ/ /dʌn/ /ləʊn/ /gɒn/ /nʌn/ /təʊn/
Knowledge, done, lone, gone, none, tone,
/wʌn/ /əˈnemənɪ/ /bal-ˈmȯr-əl/
One, anemone, Balmoral,
/ˈkɪtʃɪn/ /ˈli.ken/ /ˈlɔːndrɪ/ /ˈlɒrəl/
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel.
/’gɜːtruːd/ /ˈdʒ3ːmən/ /wɪnd/ /maɪnd/
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
/bəʊ/ /kaınd/ /‘kındrıd/ /kjuː/ /mænkˈaınd/
Beau, kind, kindred, queue, mankind,
/’tɔːtəs/ /’tɜːkwɔız/ /ˈʃæmi ˈlɛðə/
Tortoise, turquoise, chamois–leather,
/’riːdıŋ/ /’rɛdıŋ/ /’hiːðən/ /’hɛðə/
Reading, Reading, heathen, heather.
/’læbırınθ/
This phonetic labyrinth
/mɒs/ /grəʊs/ /brʊk/ /brəʊʧ/ /naınθ/ /plınθ/
Gives moss, gross, brook, brooch, ninth, plinth.
/ɛnˈdɛvəd/
Have you ever yet endeavoured
/ riˈviəd/ /ˈsɛvəd/
To pronounce revered and severed,
/‘diːmən/ /‘lɛmən/ /guːl/ /faʊl/ /səʊl/
Demon, lemon, ghoul, foul, soul,
/’piːtə/ /’pɛtrəl/ /pə’trəʊl/
Peter, petrol and patrol?
/ˈbɪlɪt/ /ˈbæl.eɪ/
Billet does not end like ballet,
/boʊˈkeɪ/ /ˈwɒlɪt/ /ˈmælɪt/ /ʃæleɪ/
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
/blʌd/ /flʌd/ /fuːd/
Blood and flood are not like food,
/məʊld/ /ʃʊd/ /wʊd/
Nor is mould like should and would.
/’bæŋkwıt/ /pɑːki/
Banquet is not nearly parquet,
/ˈkɑːki/
Which exactly rhymes with khaki.
‘dıskaʊnt /ˈvaɪkaʊnt/ /ləʊd/ /brɔːd/
Discount, viscount, load and broad,
/təˈwɔːd/ /ˈfɔːwəd/ /rɪˈwɔːd/
Toward, to forward, to reward.
/ˈrıkəʃeıd/ /ˈkrəʊʃeiıŋ/ /krəʊ’keı/
Ricocheted and crocheting, croquet?
/ˈəʊˈkeɪ/
Right! Your pronunciation’s OK.
/ˈrau̇n-dəd/ /ˈwuːndɪd/ /griːv/ /sɪv/
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
/frend/ /fiːnd/ /əˈlaɪv/ /lɪv/
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
/r/ /’haıə/
Is your r correct in higher?
/kiːts/ /ə’sɜːts/ /θə’laıə/
Keats asserts it rhymes Thalia.
/hjuː/ /hʌg/ /hʊd/ /huːt/
Hugh, but hug, and hood, but hoot,
/bɔıənt/ /’mınıt/ /maiˈnjuːt/
Buoyant, minute, but minute.
/æb’sıʃən/ /prıˈsıʒən/
Say abscission with precision,
/pəˈziʃən/ /trɑːnˈsiʒən/
Now: position and transition;
/raım/
Would it tally with my rhyme
/ ‘pærədaım/
If I mentioned paradigm?
/’tʌpəns/ /’θrıpəns/ /tiːz/ /’iːzi/
Twopence, threepence, tease are easy,
/siːs/ /kriːs/ /griːs/ /’griːzi/
But cease, crease, grease and greasy?
/kɔːnıs/ /naıs/ /və’liːs/ /rı’vaız/
Cornice, nice, valise, revise,
/’reıbiːz/ /ˈlʌləbaiz/
Rabies, but lullabies.
/ˈnɔːʃəs/
Of such puzzling words as nauseous,
/ ‘kɔːʃəs/ /’tɔːʃəs/
Rhyming well with cautious, tortious,
/lısts/ /həʊp/
You’ll envelop lists, I hope,
/’lının/ /‘ɛnvələʊp/
In a linen envelope.
/sʌm/ /mɔə/
Would you like some more? You’ll have it!
/æfı’deıvıt/ /‘deıvıd/ /’dævıt/
Affidavit, David, davit.
/æb’ʤʊə/ /’pɜːʤə/ /ʃeik/
To abjure, to perjure. Sheik
/ʧɛk/ /eık/
Does not sound like Czech but ache.
/lıbəti/ /’laıbrəri/ /hiːv/ /’hɛvən/
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
/ˈreɪt͡ʃəl/ /lɒx / /məsˈtɑːʃ/ /ɪˈlevn/
Rachel, loch, moustache, eleven.
/ˈhæləʊd/ /əˈlaʊd/
We say hallowed, but allowed,
/ˈpiːpl/ /ˈlepəd/ /təʊd/ /vaʊd/
People, leopard, towed but vowed.
/mɔːˈrəʊvə/
Mark the difference, moreover,
/ˈmuːvəʳ/ / ‘plʌvə/ /‘dəʊvə/
Between mover, plover, Dover;
/ˈliːtʃ.ɪz/ /bɹiːtʃəz/ /waɪz/ /prɪˈsaɪs/
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
/ˈtʃæl.ɪs/ /pɵˈliːs/ /laɪs/
Chalice, but police and lice,
/ˈkæməl/ /ˈkʌnstəbəl/ /ʌnˈsteɪbəl/
Camel, constable, unstable,
/ˈprɪnsɪpəl/ /dɪˈsaɪpəɫ/ /ˈleɪbəl/
Principle, disciple, label.
/’pɛtl/ /’piːnəl/ /kə’næl/
Petal, penal, and canal,
/weıt/ /sə’maız/ /plæt/ /’prɒmıs/ /pæl/
Wait, surmise, plait, promise, pal,
/sjuːt/ /swiːt/ /ˈruːin/ /’sɜːkıt/ /ˈkɒndit/
Suit, suite, ruin. Circuit, conduit
/ʃɜːk ıt/ /biˈjɒnd ıt/
Rhyme with “shirk it” and “beyond it“,
/tɛl/
But it is not hard to tell
/pɔːl/ /mɔːl/ /pɛl mɛl/
Why it’s pall, mall, but Pall Mall.
/’mʌsl/ /’mʌskjʊlə/ /ʤeıl/ /‘aıən/
Muscle, muscular, gaol, iron,
/’tımbə/ /’klaımə/ /’bʊliən/ /’laıən/
Timber, climber, bullion, lion,
/wɜːm/ /stɔːm/ /ʃeɪz/ /ˈkeɪ.ɒs/ /tʃɛə/
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
/ˈsɛn.ə.tə/ /spɛkˈteɪtə/ /ˈmɛə/
Senator, spectator, mayor.
/ˈaɪvɪ/ /ˈprɪvɪ/ /ˈfeɪməs//ˈklæmə/
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
/eı / /dræm / /’hæmə /
Has the A of drachm and hammer.
/’pʊsi / /’hʌzi / /pə’zɛs /
Pussy, hussy and possess,
/dı’zɜːt / /ˈdɛzət / /ə’drɛs /
Desert, but desert, address.
/gɒlf / /wʊlf / /’kaʊntınəns/ /lɛfˈtɛnənts /
Golf, wolf, countenance, lieutenants
/hɔıst / /ljuː/ /flægz / /ˈpɛnənts /
Hoist in lieu of flags left pennants.
/ˈkʊriə/ /’kɔətiə/ /tuːm/ /bɒm/ /kəʊm/
Courier, courtier, tomb, bomb, comb,
/kaʊ/ /ˈkuːpə/ /sʌm/ /həʊm/
Cow, but Cowper, some and home.
/ˈsɒldə/ /’səʊlʤə/ /blʌd/ /’θıkə/
“Solder, soldier! Blood is thicker“,
/kwəʊθ/ /liˈkjʊə/ /’lıkə/
Quoth he, “than liqueur or liquor“,
/’meıkıŋ/ /sæd/ /truː/
Making, it is sad but true,
/brə’veidəʊ/ /ə’duː/
In bravado, much ado.
/’streınʤə/ /’æŋgə/
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
/ˈnaɪðə/ /dɪˈvaʊə/ /ˈklæŋɡəɹ/
Neither does devour with clangour.
/’paılət/ /’pıvət/ /gɔːnt/ /ɑːnt/
Pilot, pivot, gaunt but aunt,
/fɒnt/ /frʌnt/ /wəʊnt/ /wɒnt/ /grænd/ /grɑːnt/
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant.
/’ɑːsnık/ /spɛˈsıfık/ /‘siːnık/
Arsenic, specific, scenic,
/’rɛlık/ /’rɛtərık/ /haı’ʤiːnık/
Relic, rhetoric, hygienic.
/ˈgʊzbəri/ /guːs/ /kləʊz/ /kləʊs/
Gooseberry, goose, and close, but close,
/’pærədaıs/ /raız/ /rəʊz/ /dəʊs/
Paradise, rise, rose, and dose.
/ın’veı/ /neı/ /ın’viːgl/
Say inveigh, neigh, but inveigle,
/’iːgl/
Make the latter rhyme with eagle.
/miːˈəndərıŋ/ /miːn/
Mind! Meandering but mean,
/væləntaın/ /mægəˈziːn/
Valentine and magazine.
/diə/ /’pɛni/
And I bet you, dear, a penny,
/’mænifəʊld/ /mɛni/
You say mani-(fold) like many,
/’reıpıə/ /piə/
Which is wrong. Say rapier, pier,
/’taıə/ /taız/ /tiə/
Tier (one who ties), but tier.
/ɑːʧ/ /’ɑːk’eınʤəl/ /preı/ / ‘ɜːrıŋ/
Arch, archangel; pray, does erring
/’hɛrıŋ/ /’stɜːrıŋ/
Rhyme with herring or with stirring?
/’prızn/ /’baısən/ /‘trɛʃə trəʊv/
Prison, bison, treasure trove,
/’triːzn/ /ˈhɒvə/ /ˈkʌvə/ /kəʊv/
Treason, hover, cover, cove,
/pɜːsiˈviərəns/ /’sɛvərəns/ /’rıbəld/
Perseverance, severance. Ribald
/’paıbɔːld/ /’nıbld/
Rhymes (but piebald doesn’t) with nibbled.
/’feııtn/ /’piːən/ /næt/ /gɔːt/ /nɔː/
Phaeton, paean, gnat, ghat, gnaw,
/ˈliːən/ /’saıkık/ /ʃɒn/ /bəʊn/ /ʃɔː/
Lien, psychic, shone, bone, pshaw.
/daʊn/ /əʊn/ /rʌf/
Don’t be down, my own, but rough it,
/ˈbʊfei/ /ˈbʌfit/
And distinguish buffet, buffet;
/bruːd/ /stʊd/ / ruːf/ /rʊk/ /skuːl/ /wʊl/ /buːn/
Brood, stood, roof, rook, school, wool, boon,
/’wʊstə/ /’bʊlın/ /ım’pjuːn/
Worcester, Boleyn, to impugn.
/kə’rɛkt/ /’stɜːlıŋ/
Say in sounds correct and sterling
/hɜːs/ /hıə/ /’hɑːkn/ /jiə/ /’jɜːliŋ/
Hearse, hear, hearken, year and yearling.
/’iːvl/ /’dɛvl/ /ˈmɛdzəʊtint/
Evil, devil, mezzotint,
/zɛd/
Mind the z! (A gentle hint.)
/ə’tɛnʃən/
Now you need not pay attention
/’mɛnʃən/
To such sounds as I don’t mention,
/pɔəz/ /pɔːz/ /pɔəz/ /pɔːz/
Sounds like pores, pause, pours and paws,
/jɔːz/
Rhyming with the pronoun yours;
/ın’kluːdıd/
Nor are proper names included,
/əz juː dıd/
Though I often heard, as you did,
/’fʌni/ /’juːnıkɔːn/
Funny rhymes to unicorn,
/vɔːn/ /strɔːn/
Yes, you know them, Vaughan and Strachan.
/’meıdn/ /kɔi/ /ˈkʌmli/
No, my maiden, coy and comely,
/kəl’mʌndli/
I don’t want to speak of Cholmondeley.
/fruːd/ /praʊd/
No. Yet Froude compared with proud
/məˈklaʊd/
Is no better than McLeod.
/’trıvıəl/ /’vaıəl/
But mind trivial and vial,
/’traıpɒd/ /’miːnıəl/ /dı’naıəl/
Tripod, menial, denial,
/trəʊl/ /’trɒli/ /rɛlm/ /riːm/
Troll and trolley, realm and ream,
/’ʃɛʤuːl/ /’mıstʃıf/ /sızm/ /skiːm/
Schedule, mischief, schism, and scheme.
/’ɑːʤıl/ /ʤıl/ /ɑː’gaıl/ /gıl/ /ˈʃɔːli/
Argil, gill, Argyll, gill. Surely
/’rɔːli/
May be made to rhyme with Raleigh,
/seı/
But you’re not supposed to say
/pıˈkɛt/ /ˈsəʊbrikei/
Piquet rhymes with sobriquet.
/’invəlid/ /ın’vælıd/
Had this invalid invalid
/’pælıd/
Worthless documents? How pallid,
/ʌn’kuːθ/ /’kaʊʧənt/
How uncouth he, couchant, looked,
/ˈpɔətsməθ/
When for Portsmouth I had booked!
/zjuːs/ /θiːbz/ /’θeıliːz/ /æfrəʊ’daıti/
Zeus, Thebes, Thales, Aphrodite,
/’pærəmʊə/ /ɛˈnæməd/ /’flaıti/
Paramour, enamoured, flighty,
/ɛpısəʊdz/ /æn’tıpədiːz/
Episodes, antipodes,
/ækwiː’ɛs/ /ˈɒbsikwiːz/
Acquiesce, and obsequies.
/’mʌŋki/ /ˈgeizə/
Please don’t monkey with the geyser,
/ˈteitəz/ /’reızə/
Don’t peel ‘taters with my razor,
/pjʊə/
Rather say in accents pure:
/’neıʧə/ /ˈstætjə/ /mə’tjʊə/
Nature, stature and mature.
/’paıəs/ /‘ımpıəs/ /lım/ /klaım/ /ˈglʌmli/
Pious, impious, limb, climb, glumly,
/’wʊstıd/ /ˈwɜːstid/ /ˈkrʌmbli/ /dʌmli/
Worsted, worsted, crumbly, dumbly,
/’kɒŋkə/ /’kɒŋkwɛst/
/vɑːz/ /feız/ /fæn/
Conquer, conquest, vase, phase, fan,
/wɒn/ /sı’dæn/ /ɑːtı’zæn/
Wan, sedan and artisan.
/ˈtiːˈeıʧ/ /trʌbl juː/
The th will surely trouble you
/ɑː/ /’siː’eitʃ/ /’dʌbljuː/
More than r, ch or w.
/ʤɛmz/
Say then these phonetic gems:
/’tɒməs/ /taım/ /tə’riːsə/ /tɛmz/
Thomas, thyme, Theresa, Thames.
/’tɒmpsən/ /’ʧætəm/ /’wɒltəm/ /’strɛtəm/
Thompson, Chatham, Waltham, Streatham,
/ðɛm/
There are more but I forget ’em–
/’æntəni/
Wait! I’ve got it: Anthony,
/’laıtn/ /æŋ’zaıəti/
Lighten your anxiety.
/ɔːl’biːıt/
The archaic word albeit
/eıt/ /ıt/
Does not rhyme with eight -you see it;
/wıð/ /fɔəθˈwiθ/ /vɔıs/
With and forthwith, one has voice,
/ʧɔis/
One has not, you make your choice.
/ʃuː/ /gəʊz/ /dʌz/ /ˈfɪŋgəʳ/
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say: finger;
/ˈsɪŋəʳ/ /ˈdʒɪndʒəʳ/ /ˈlɪŋgəʳ/
Then say: singer, ginger, linger.
/rɪəl/ /ziːl/ /məʊv/ /gɔːz/ /gaʊdʒ/ /geɪdʒ/
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
/ˈmærɪdʒ/ /ˈfəʊlɪɪdʒ/ /ˈmɪrɑːʒ/ /eɪdʒ/
Marriage, foliage, mirage, age.
/’hiərəʊ/ /‘hɛrən/ /ˈkwiəri/ /’vɛri/
Hero, heron, query, very,
/’pæri/ /‘tæri/ /’fjʊəri/ /’bɛri/
Parry, tarry fury, bury,
/dʌst/ /lɒst/ /pəʊst/ /dʌθ/ /klɒθ/ /ləʊθ/
Dost, lost, post, and doth, cloth, loth,
/ʤɒb/ /ʤəʊb/ /’blɒsəm/ /’bʊzəm/ /əʊθ/
Job, Job, blossom, bosom, oath.
/fɔː/ /ə’pʌgnənt/ /əˈpjuːnəz/
Faugh, oppugnant, keen oppugners,
/’bəʊıŋ/ /ˈbaʊiŋ/ /ˈbænʤəʊ/ /ˈtjuːnəz/
Bowing, bowing, banjo–tuners
/həʊm/ /nəʊz/ /kənˈuːz/
Holm you know, but noes, canoes.
/’pjuːni/ /’truːızm/ /juːs/ /juːz/
Puisne, truism, use, to use?
/’lıtl/
Though the difference seems little,
/’æktjuːəl/ /’vıtl/
We say actual, but victual,
/siːt/ /swɛt/ /ʧeıst/ /kɑːst/ /liː/ /eıt/ /haıt/
Seat, sweat, chaste, caste, Leigh, eight, height,
/pʊt/ /nʌt/ /’grænıt/ /juː’naıt/
Put, nut, granite, and unite.
/’riːfə/ /dɛfə /
Reefer does not rhyme with deafer.
/’fɛfə/ /ˈzefəʳ/ /ˈhefəʳ/
Feoffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
/dʌl/ /bʊl/ /’ʤɛfri/ /dʒɔːdʒ/ /eɪt/
/leɪt/
Dull, bull, Geoffrey, George, ate, late.
/hɪnt/ /paɪnt/ /ˈsenɪt/ /si-ˈdāt/
Hint, pint, senate but sedate;
/’geılık/ /‘ærəbık/ /pə’sıfık/
Gaelic, Arabic, pacific,
/ˈsaɪəns/ /ˈkɒnʃəns/ /ˌsaɪənˈtɪfɪk/
Science, conscience, scientific.
/tɔː/ /ˈaʊə/ /dʊə/ /ˈsʌ.kɚ/ /fɔː/
Tour, but our, dour, succour, four.
/ɡæs/ /əˈlas/ /ˈɑɹ.kən.sɔ/
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
/mə’njuːvə/ /jɒt/ /’vɒmıt/
Say manoeuvre, yacht and vomit,
/əʊ’mıt/ /ˈdıfəz/ /ıt/
Next omit, which differs from it
/’bəʊnəˈfaidi/ /’ælıbaı/
Bona fide, alibi
/’ʤaiəreıt/ /’daʊri/ /ə’raı/
Gyrate, dowry and awry.
/siː/ /aɪˈdɪə/ /’gıni/ /’ɛərıə/
Sea, idea, guinea, area,
/sɑːm/ /məˈɹiːə/ /məˈlɛərɪə/
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
/juːθ/ /saʊθ/ /ˈsʌðən/ /klɛnz/ /kliːn/
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
/ˈdɒktɹɪn/ /ˈtɜː.pən.ˌtaɪn/ /məˈri:n/
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
/ˈeɪ.li.ən/ /ɪˈtæljən/
Compare alien with Italian,
/ˈdæn.dɪ.laɪ.ən/ /bəˈtælɪən/
Dandelion with battalion.
/ˈsæ.li/ /əˈlaɪ/ /jeɪ/ /jiː/
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
/aɪ/ /aɪ/ /aɪ/ /eɪ/ /weɪ/ /kiː/ /kiː/
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, key, quay!
/ˈeɪvə/ /ˈɛvə/ /ˈfiːvə/
Say aver, but ever, fever,
/ˈnaɪðə/ /ˈlɛʒə/ /skeɪn/ /rɪˈsiːvə/
Neither, leisure, skein, receiver.
/seıf/
Never guess-it is not safe,
/kɑːvz/ /vælvz/ /hɑːf/ /reıf/
We say calves, valves, half, but Ralf.
/’stɑːri/ /ˈɡrænəɹi/ /kɘ’nɛɹi/
Starry, granary, canary.
/ˈkɹɛvɪs/ /dəˈvaɪs/ /’ɛəri/
Crevice, but device and eyrie.
/feıs/ /’prɛfıs/ /griˈmeis/
Face, but preface, then grimace,
/flɛm/ /flɛɡˈmætɪk/ /æs/ /ɡlɑːs/ /beɪs/
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
/bæs/ /lɑːdʒ/ /tɑːɡɪt/ /dʒɪn/ /ɡɪv/ /ˈvɜːʤıŋ /
Bass, large, target, gin, give, verging,
/ɔːt/ /aʊst/ /dʒaʊst/ /skaʊə/ /’skɜːdʒiŋ/
Ought, oust, joust, and scour, but scourging.
/ɪə̯/ /ɜːn/ /ɛə/ /tɛə/
Ear, but earn and ere and tear
/hıə/ /ɛə/
Do not rhyme with here but heir.
/əʊ/ /ɒf/ /ˈɔːfən/
Mind the o of off and often
/’ɔːfən/
Which may be pronounced as orphan,
/sɔː/ /sɔːs/
With the sound of saw and sauce;
/sɒft/ /lɒst/ /klɒθ/ /krɔːs/
Also soft, lost, cloth and cross.
/’pʊdıŋ/ /’pʌdl/ /ˈpʊtıŋ/ /ˈpʌtıŋ/
Pudding, puddle, putting. Putting?
/gɒlf/ /’ʃʌtıŋ/
Yes: at golf it rhymes with shutting.
/’rɛspıt/ /spaıt/ /kən’sɛnt/ /rı’zɛnt/
Respite, spite, consent, resent.
/’laıəbl/ /ˈpɑːlimɛnt/
Liable, but Parliament.
/’sɛvn/ /’iːvn/
Seven is right, but so is even,
/’haıfən/ /’rʌfn/ /’nɛvjuː/ /’stiːvn/
Hyphen, roughen, nephew, Stephen,
/’mʌŋki/ /ˈdɒŋki/ /klɑːk/ /ʤɜːk/
Monkey, donkey, clerk and jerk,
/æsp/ /grɑːsp/ /wɒsp/ /dı’meın/ /kɔːk/ /wɜːk/
Asp, grasp, wasp, demesne, cork, work.
/eı/ /’vælə/ /’væpıd/ /‘veıpə/
A of valour, vapid vapour,
/ɛs/ /njuːz/ /’njuːspeıpə/
S of news (compare newspaper),
/ʤiː/ /’ʤıbıt/ /’gıbən/ /ʤıst/
G of gibbet, gibbon, gist,
/aı/ /’æntıkraıst/ /grıst/
I of antichrist and grist,
/’dıfə/ /daıˈvɜːs/ /’daıvəz/
Differ like diverse and divers,
/’rıvəz/ /ˈstraivəz/ /’ʃıvəz/ /’faivəz/
Rivers, strivers, shivers, fivers.
/wʌns/ /nɒns/ /təʊl/ /dɒl/ /rəʊl/
Once, but nonce, toll, doll, but roll,
/’pəʊlıʃ/ /’pɒlıʃ/ /pɒl/ /pəʊl/
Polish, Polish, poll and poll.
/ˈsaɪ.ki/
Pronunciation, think of Psyche,
/ˈpeɪlɪŋ/ /staʊt/ /ˈspaɪkɪ/
Is a paling stout and spiky.
/wɪts/
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
/ɡɹəʊts/ /ɡɹɪts/
Writing groats and saying grits?
/dɑɹk/ /əˈbɪs/ /ˈtʌn(ə)l/
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel
/ˈstɹuːn/ /stəʊnz/ /‘rɒlək/ /ˈgʌnl/
Strewn with stones like rowlock, gunwale,
/ˈɪzlɪŋtən/ /aɪ̯l/ /waɪt/
Islington, and Isle of Wight,
/ˈhaʊs.waɪf/ /ˈvɝ.dɪkt/ /ˌɪnˈdaɪt/
Housewife, verdict and indict.
/’riːdə/ /ˈrɑːðə/
Don’t you think so, reader, rather,
/’læðə/ /’beıðə/ /’fɑːðə/
Saying lather, bather, father?
/ɪˈnʌf/
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
/ðəʊ/ /θɹuː/ /baʊ/ /kɒf/ /hɒk/ /sʌf/ /tʌf/
Though, through, bough, cough, hough, sough, tough??
/ˈhɪkʌp/ /kʌp/
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
/ɡɪv/ /ʌp/
My advice is: GIVE IT UP!
Sources and resources:
“The Chaos by Gerard Nolst Trenité”. Drop Your Foreign Accent: engelsche uitspraakoefeningen. 1922. Access date: April 2016. Available at: http://ncf.idallen.com/english.html
You can look for the IPA transcription of words at:
· “Wordreference.com”. Last update: 2016. Access date: April 2016. Available at: http://www.wordreference.com
· Wikimedia Foundation, “Wiktionary”. Last update: April 2016. Access date: April 2016. Available at: https://www.wiktionary.org/
An interactive tool:
I later found this website with a more simplified version of the poem. You can use the player with the autoscroll function, and pronunciation will appear simultaneously.
·“Chaos challenge”. Access date: April 2016. http://chaoschallenge.org/
